This one's for YOU, Sam.

Well, as luck would have it, we came home from dinner tonight to find out that Arnold ate the head off of our son's Batman toy.

Yeah, yeah, the dog is kind of funny in this one. But sadly, the REALLY funny part I didn't capture on tape. My son yelled out from upstairs, "ARNOLD ATE MY BATMAN TOY!", and instantly that bad dog's ears went back and he stopped dead. in. his. tracks. You've never seen a guiltier dog in the world.

My favorite part about this video in particular is the background track of my son RANTING about the 'BAD DOG'. You can hear him complaining to anyone who will listen (which, at the time, was nobody), declaring among other things, that there will be "NO SHOW" for Arnold.

As you can see, Arnold is VERY depressed that he won't be getting a TV show before bed.



P.S. And I promise, after this? I will stop posting about this dumb dog. Who is sitting right beside me on the couch. Watching A SHOW.

LAZY

I am so lazy these days.

Exhausted and just plain old TIRED.

Ready for a close-eyed REST at all times.

It's during phases like these in my life when I really wholeheartedly cannot tolerate long blog posts. I'll just take one look at a blog entry with over 10 paragraphs and just CLOSE DOWN THE BROWSER. Even after a cup of coffee and a can of DPeps...I can't summon the strength.

I'd like to take this moment to kick a shout out to all of my big old lazies like me, who've got a nap in their near future, who just don't have the TIME for the long blog post.

THIS is my gift to you.

Julie & Julia: No spoilers here.

I saw Julie & Julia tonight, and I really loved it. It was a great story, it definitely made me hungry, made me feel inadequate in the kitchen...but gave me NO desire to buy the cookbook.

Now that I've told you how much I loved it, here's what bugged me about the movie: the Stanley Tucci role. He played the part of Julia's husband. I do not feel he did a bad job acting, I just don't think he LOOKED the part.

Instead of looking like her doting husband, (who was, in reality, 10 years her senior and fairly matched in the looks department), he instead looked like a shiny, golden tanned, very attractive and much younger man. And I wasn't even feeling a strong hetero vibe from him, if you catch my drift.

Let's look at the REAL Paul & Julia:

Believable, no? They look like a pair. He looks 10 years older (because he IS). He even looks straight. A sweet couple. Believable.

Now let's look at the movie pair:


Is anyone else feeling me on this? That was the one and ONLY thing that disturbed me about the picture....watching their makeout scenes just felt...well, WRONG. I wasn't buying it. I thought the casting choice was poor, and if nothing else, they could have made Stanley look a little older, a bit taller, less dapper, a bit less tan? I mean, they CERTAINLY succeeded in making Meryl look old and unattractive. We're supposed to believe those two LIVED together while her wrinkled face rivaled Casper the ghost, and his smooth skin screamed "FRENCH RIVIERA"? I'm just sayin', it was bothersome for me. Anyone else? Anyone? (crickets chirping)

What was only a teeny tad bothersome was the unbelievable amount of disgusting eating you have to watch (and listen to!) in order to get through the movie. I mean, the MASTICATING! THE CHEWING NOISES! You'll see food fall out of a mouth on more than one occassion. Gah. But, again, since it was only a MINOR peeve of mine, I'm not even going to bring it up.

Lastly, for your DVD renting pleasure, I have invented a drinking game for Julie & Julia: every time you see a cardigan, you must take a drink.* This is tricky, as you will also see an abundance of blazers, lightweight jackets, capes and overcoats. Probably best to play with a light beer or wine spritzer or you'll be loaded by the time the credits roll.

But I really DID like the movie. You should see it if you haven't already. And tell me if you agree with me about the casting thing, okay? Tell me I'm not crazy.

*Cardigans tied around the neck count for a drink also.

The Face of Shame

Arnold was caught eating one of my son's Toy Story figurines. I took a video of it.

If you've never seen a bulldog (whose tongue doesn't fit in his mouth) look terribly ashamed, it's worth 55 seconds of your time.

If you HAVE seen a long-tongued bulldog look guilt-ridden, then just go ahead and move along. Nothing to see here.

Euro Boom is back!

Because my children were wandering around like orphans for a almost two weeks, it seems that everyone in town knows where we've been. And whenever someone asks me "HOW WAS THE TRIP?" I have to quickly decide if they really like me or just sort of mildly tolerate me before I tell them the truth: it was a fabulous 5-star vacation, we did lots of hopping around in France, Spain and Portugal...but it was WAY too long for me. By the end, I had FINALLY earned my sea legs, only to find it impossible to stand on still ground...and I just couldn't take eating another 5-course gourmet meal.

You know, when I say something that sounds that snotty, I sort of imagine people feeling about ME the way I feel about my size-4 wearing friends who moan about how 'FAT' they have gotten since they had a bite of that chocolate chip two weeks ago. That's when I would like to smother them to death in my fat rolls.

So, most of the time, when people ask me "OH MY WORD YOU WENT TO FABOO EUROPE FOR NEARLY A DECADE AND TELL ME, HOW WAS THE TRIP?", I reply with a flashy smile and a "It was AWESOME!". But, can I be honest here? YES, there were parts of it that were really, truly AWESOME (my favorite? The Guggenheim and Bilbao, Spain). And there were parts where I was really, truly ready to go HOME.

I have never been away from my kids for that long, and while I'm not one of those moms who moans and whines about "missing my babies" while they take a jaunt to the restroom, I have decided I don't need to be away from them for longer than four days. Okay, maybe FIVE. But it's got to be the most PERFECT Boom-tailored vacation for me to be away for five.

Maybe that was it? Maybe the truth is that there is no vacation on Earth that is as wonderful as being with my two kids?!

But Lord help me if I said THAT to the random people who ask me about it. I would want to punch my own self in the face with a response like that.

Out Shopping For Books...

I've decided to just take all of your wonderful book reccommendations and just throw them in the trash. I'm going to spend my vacation reading the biography of Nene Leakes, one of the more frightening cast members of the Housewives of Atlanta.

If I finish it on the plane ride out, I'll simply re-read it until I can finally learn my lessons the EASY way.

Can we please discuss how hard up you'd have to be to be seeking life and love insights from NENE?

I am in NO way acknowledging that I watch this show. I've flipped by it and paused once. Or maybe twice. But that's IT.

Suggestions, please?

Hi there. If you're out there...whomever you may be...would you please comment on this post and give me some good book suggestions?

We're getting ready to leave for our trip in a few days, and I need to prepare. We're going to be on the boat for a good portion of the trip and I will DESPERATELY need something to do. There will be NO internet. NO television. Just BOOKS. And CONVERSATION. I'm bracing myself over here. I'm a little concerned that after one whole day of deafening silence, I'll go absolutely batty and hoist myself onto the hull of the ship, screaming profanity at the dolphins.

I just can't picture it, is all I'm saying. I'm trying to be prepared.

Give me anything you have ever read that you really enjoyed. All genres welcome. I like everything from David Sedaris to Max Lucado. So, seriously...ALL genres! Let me know what book(s) you have read that you enjoyed! I'm making a list for the bookstore.

THANKS!!